0 years 9 months 2 weeks 5 days

Dear Austen,

I haven't been writing, but that doesn't mean you haven't been doing things! Let me catch us all up to speed....

You have 8 teeth. You LOVE to bite things! Pillows, blankets, toys, Daddy.....haha. You seem to bite Daddy a little more than Mommy...though occassionally I experience a nibble from you!
You are OFFICIALLY MOBILE! We had to baby-proof the apartment when you turned 7 months. You now have expanded your play area from the living room to the kitchen and dining room. You also love the hall, because you love to play with the door-stoppers. They make a VERY satisfying "Boooiiing"!!
You are also standing unassisted! You have been walking about with the assistance of the couch for some time, but now you are trying to walk without help. You don't make it far! But we know that it won't be long!
Your favorite movie is Toy Story, though Cars takes a very close second! I am planning on getting you a Buzz Lightyear and Woody doll for your birthday, which is fast approaching! Cousin Alea had her birthday last month...so hard to believe how old you two are! She is very close to walking as well, though she is definitely more coordinated than you, as she has those three months on you! It won't be long before you two are the same. I look forward to how you grow and change!

You must be the happiest baby!So easy. Very good natured. You still deal so well with Mommy and Daddy both working full time. Right now Daddy is back in school again, which he stopped when you were born. Now you spend Tuesday mornings with Grandma Biggs, and you are used to it at last! Always takes a while to get used to a new place. You don't like being left, however, as you now realize that showing up at either Grandma's house, means Mommy goes to work! :(
Wednesdays and Thursdays you still go to Grandma Brunettes. Mondays and Fridays you are home with Daddy though! and every weekend, you get Mommy-time!!!

Right now you favor Daddy just a tiny bit more, which is funny because your first word is officially "mama" and you always call for me when you get sleepy. Daddy is a favorite for playtime though! Same with Grandpa Brunette. Little boys just love rough playtimes!

Naptime is always a rough thing- you have an erratic schedule. But you still do very well considering. You have been eating your solids really well now though! You love sweet potatoes and yams, and alllllll your fruits! We are just starting protiens, and you don't care for the textures! But we will get there. Always a process! Your favorite new things are Cheerios and cheese!

Aunt Judy should be coming to visit for your birthday, and bringing cousin Zach! Thats exciting. Daddy and I are also planning on taking you camping for the first time too! Woohoo! Can't wait. Just a couple months!

That's all for now. I will write soon! I love you dearly, and thank every day that I am so blessed with such a precious son. :)

Much love,
Mommy

0 years 5 months 3 weeks 4 days

Dear Austen,

We have our first tooth! Yay! You cut it last night, chewing on Daddy's finger! haha! He was giving you a bath and you were gumming away so he stuck his finger in your mouth to rub your gums and you chewed so hard it broke through! My, how big you're getting!
You've been sick for over a week. :( I think you're finally starting to feel better, though your schedule is all messed up because right now you and I are up and it's only 5:30am, and you woke me up at 4:30! Gonna be a long day for Mommy! But that's okay, you were so cute. You rolled over in bed (you've been sleeping in bed with us again since you got sick) and looked up at me with the BIGGEST darn smile!
You got sick last Monday, and were really stuffed up and sneezy. Then you got fevers, really low grade, but fevers. You were really fussy and just overall didn't feel good. I missed two and a half days of work! We went to your doctors and saw a different doctor than Dr. Hyder and you just loved her...haha. Cood and just showed off for her, it was hilarious. :) But, they gave us antibiotics that we still haven't given you in hopes you would improve, which you finally are, though you have the worst cough I've ever heard in such a little guy! Keeps us all up at night.
You being sick, is like having a newborn all over again! Up all night, don't nap more than an hour at a time...it's been a long week indeed! So glad to see you smiling and happy this morning!
You have been eating solids for three weeks now. We started with Green Beans...you thought the spoon was cool...not such a fan of the green stuff on it. ;P The rice cereal is okay with you...you prefer it with breastmilk but eat it with formula too. After green beans we did avocado. That you loved! Yum yum! Then came carrots, which were liked a lot better than the beans! And this week we've been on Peas, which Daddy made! You like them too, though you've taken a break on solids being sick- you've been so stuffed up and unable to breath through your nose so we decided to wait and pick them up again. So we just started them again. Last night you kicked the bowl and got peas all over the wall! We really need to get that high chair! LOL! I will order it this month. You've just sat in your bouncer or on our laps for eating.
You can sit up for a little while unassisted! You love it. Then you decide you want something REALLY far away and you fall over! haha. Flat on your tummy, then you scoot along. Almost crawling! So much has changed in such a short time. My growing boy!
You will be six whole months next week! Mommy's so excited! I can't wait until you feel completely better and sleep though the night again- it only happened a week or two before you got sick. I don't blame you, being sick is awful. Been the hardest thing watching you feeling so yucky all the time. Been hard on all of us. Your smile this morning shows me that you should be your rambunctious self again soon!
Well, I better go get you a bottle and then get myself ready for work. We're going to Grandmas here in a little while! You still love Grandma-days! You now just adore Laney and the cats! And Grandma has a walker that you can walk around the kitchen in....which you think is pretty awesome! Grandpas birthday is this Friday too. You got him something pretty cool! :)

Oh, and sorry I didn't write on your first Christmas. It went so well, and you were really smart and figured out that wrapped presents had cooler stuff inside! You got a lot of neat stuff and you love it all! The tree was your favorite- we did a blinking blue-light tree with all blue ornaments for our little boy! SO pretty!

Love you always and forever my little one. You are a constant joy to watch grow and learn.

Love,
Mommy

0 years 4 months 0 weeks 7 days

My little Aus-meister,

Happy Thanksgiving my little one!

Oh, how I continue to think of writing you and never finding the time! In the end I simply end up writing longer letters farther apart, while not ideal, I still get most of my thoughts on here.

You are HUGE! I have to constantly remember to add the clause= "but he's not fat!" whenever people ask how much you weigh! You are almost 17 lbs now, and wearing mostly 6 month clothing! You little chubber! Haha! Really, you're just very stocky, long torso, long arms....you're not really very chubby at all! ADORABLE, but not chubby, though I do like to call you the 'chubster'...lol.

You amaze me daily. It's as if you wake up some mornings and just decide that today you will do something new that you didn't do 8 hours earlier! Just this morning you are holding a teether and chewing on it, no problem, wheras it seems like just a few days ago I had to hold it for you or you got frustrated. So amazing! You can sit upright for a few seconds without falling, and you LOVE being on your tummy now! You just look around and play with whatever is in front of you. Rolling over is now old news....

You adore tv...Yo Gabba Gabba never fails to give you a smile, and Blues Clues is a favorite as well. You laugh and kick when they dance...just so cute. Your teething seems to have calmed for a while, so no fevers or tears over painful gums for the time being. I'm sure it won't be long and you will go back into the phase again. Always growing!

You are getting much better at taking your bottles, especially when mommy isn't around. You like to hold them, or the hand that is feeding you. I can show you your bottle and sometimes you just reach for it and pull it into your mouth. Your dexterity is improving greatly!

Still the most easy-going, well tempered child! You just smile when I get to Grandmas to pick you up, and are so patient to nurse if that's what you want. Still mixing breastmilk and formula when mommy is at work, you seems to enjoy it a lot, though are still very accepting of formula alone when need be.

Daddy gave you a taste of sweet potatoes on our pre-Thanksgiving at Grandma and Grandpa Brunettes on Sunday! You made THE cutest disgusted face I've ever seen!

You really enjoyed your Aunt Judy's visit this last week! She loved being around you, though it's always sad when she leaves. She brought you a ball that you simply ADORE and a stuffed doggy named Ozzy! You like him a lot too.

Well, that's all for now. You're talking to me from the living room so I'd better go. I need to give you a bath and then we will be going to Grandma and Grandpa Biggs for Thanksgiving with the whole family! I love you dearly, and thank God every day that he blessed me with such a fantastic son, who never ceases to be the light of my life. I love you unconditionally as you grow and change!

Love always,
Mommy

0 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days

Dear ever-growing Austen,

Oh I really thought that I would write you more often when I started this. However, life has taken a sudden plunge into frantically busy days and even busier evenings. So who knew...that working full time, having a child at home, and still trying to keep a household moving smoothly would be such a task?! I kid, I think I always knew. Just maybe not so much.

You, my little one, are teething like a fiend, and so early! You are just shy of 4 months now, and a healthy and happy chunky 16 pounder! You are currently wearing 6 month clothing, and an occasional 9 month outfit. Still so long and slender though, so you always look so cute in your long-sleeved clothes because I have to roll your sleeves! ha!

Your poor teeth though. I feel so helpless, you just bite and gnaw on everything, and although you're not a fan of either the cold teething rings OR the numbing teething gel, you always seem a little happier afterwards! You look at me so upset though! And as a breastfeeding mommy, let me just say "Bad Austen! No biting!" haha! No, really you've done well. I can tell when you're really hurting and we just work with it. I still feel helpless that I can't always be there to work through it with you.

On the subject of not always being there, being back to work is getting harder for me. I thought it would get easier, but it's just gradually hurting more. I see you changing, and being a newly developed child each weekend, and that pains me more than I can even tell you. I love my job, and while I'm there I'm happy to do whatever I need to do, but deep inside I just feel so frustrated that I should be somewhere else. Home, with you, is where I know I should be. It is utterly unnatural to be separated from your children, and I still have yet to have had a weekend without some tears. When I am with you, you smile and laugh and cry, and all I can feel is how stupid it is that I am not always there when you go through your emotions. You do however still adore Grandma's house every Tuesday and Wednesday, so that is helpful. You tend to give Daddy a little more trouble but we have decided that is because when you're with Daddy you just associate it with me, and thus don't always understand. You are the easiest with me, and the most at ease with me, and I keep telling myself that it is simply awful that you cannot always be. I never truly imagined how hard it would be, and it is a thousand times harder.

Anyways, let's not dwell on the bad things! You are so healthy and happy, and that is wonderful! I tell myself often how lucky we are to have a healthy child, and wonder what it would be like if you were sick. So many people I talk to with children with health issues, or frankly, people who I talk to that simply do not value their children. Heartbreaking. You are the most important piece of my life, and I will do whatever it is that I have to do that makes it better for you.

I hate that your teeth hurt you! I hope it gets better soon! You get so frustrated with the teethers because your dexterity is not quite yet there...so you need help holding them in your mouth. So sad! It won't be long! You are constantly changing and surprising us! You have been rolling over for weeks now, and you almost (almost!) sit up for a few seconds alone! So cute!

You are my joy. I love you immensely and treasure every moment with you. Thank you for being such a fantastic, amazing child! We love you, Austen. :) Your Aunt Judy will be here in a week or so to visit you, and I can't wait for you to spend some time with her when you do more than just eat, sleep and poop! Haha! Now you laugh and talk and kick too! Such a sweet little man!

Love Always,
Mommy

0 years 3 months 0 weeks 4 days

Dear Austen,

Oh my dear son, you are doing so well! You are such a wonderful, easy-going child!
You are adapting very well to mommy going back to work, and you are dealing so well with your new schedule. You simply ADORE Grandma’s house! Every Tuesday and Wednesday you wake up with Mommy and have breakfast (mommy-milk!) and then watch some Shaun the Sheep while Mommy wakes up and has coffee. Then you have a diaper change and wait for Mommy to shower before we leave for Grandma’s. You always wake up when we get there and smile! You look around and realize where you are, and just perk right up! I’m beginning to think you enjoy Grandma’s house more than your own home! Haha!
We’ve figured a wonderful arrangement of mixing formula and breastmilk in your bottles and you eat so much better without me. When you’re with me I still give you only formula since I am, after all, the source of the breastmilk!
Daddy is still adjusting and working to find a ‘schedule’ when he is with you, Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays. Sometimes you have a great day with him, other days you just fuss and miss Mommy. One day I drove home on lunch to calm you down, feed you, and put you to sleep. But overall, you are dealing very well. Daddy is learning all your quirks and preferences, and you are getting used to the irregularities of your schedule.
Today you are home with Daddy since it's Friday, and I don’t think he is leaving so I’m going to run home to see you on lunch. I’m sure you’re doing well, but I miss you! You've been sleeping SO much and eating so much lately, I imagine you're sleeping away without a care in the world! Three month growth-spurt!!

Love always,
Mommy

0 years 2 months 2 weeks 4 days

Dear Austen,

Well, you had your two month shots! You did surprisingly well. Your reflex was to go to sleep, which you did...and unfortunately had a rude awakening of one needle in each leg! Owch! It was heartbreaking, but you were awesome about it! Now only a few more months and we get to do it again!.....

In less encouraging news, mommy is back to work. I hate it. You hate it. We officially hate mommy not being home with you. The end. But...we do what we do for a reason. Mommy knows she has to work, even though it isn't what we want to do.
The first day you stayed home with daddy, and it went okay, though you refused to eat much of the day, and also didn't want to sleep. As soon as I got home, you cried a little and then proceeded to nurse for FOUR HOURS STRAIGHT!!!! wow. You missed me, it was obvious!
Yesterday you spent your first day and Grandma and Grandpa Brunette's. Since you were so tired from Monday, you slept all morning! According to Grandma, you did exceptionally well all day, lots of smiles and happiness, except for feeding time. We assume this is because you realize you're hungry, and that you want to breastfeed. I got to Grandma's at 5:30pm to pick yo0u up after work, and you smiled at me, I picked you up, you smiled again, then you smelled me.
Instant tears....inconsolable, freaking-out tears for over ten minutes. It was AWFUL! You broke mommy's heart! You wouldn't even look at me, just kept panicing and grabbing my clothes and screaming. You refused to breastfeed, and only slightly calmed when I went into the bathroom where you could see 'us' in the mirror. But then you freaked out again....
When you finally did calm down, you nursed for about 20 minutes and fell asleep. When you woke up again, I was forgiven! You smiled and were perfectly happy. You didn't like being put back into your carseat, but you were fine. We went home and the evening went better than Monday, you nursed a little, drank 2oz of formula, smiled and were happy. :)

We shall see how today goes.....you weren't too happy to be put into your carseat again this morning, but you were pretty smiley at Grandma's before I left. I hope, though am prepared for it, that you don't have a fit tonight. But it's still early and you will get used to this.
It isn't easy for me either. I do okay while I'm away from you, but your reaction to it is breaking my heart. I have only cried briefly, but I most certainly miss you more than I even believed possible. I hope that someday this will all be over. Until then, know that I love you and miss you every second that we are apart.

Love you, child,
Mommy

0 years 2 months 1 week 0 days

Dear Austen,

You've been eating beetles!!!
There was a Similac recall on Thursday, stating that there was the possibility of beetles, beetle parts, and larvae in the formula. Of course as luck would have it, that's what you've been eating! The liquid is okay, which is a good thing, because I bought you Enfamil, and you absolutely HATE it. I can't believe we have been giving you beetles though! So disgusting. We've been making jokes all week...everytime you sneeze- "Beetle in your nose?" or when you fuss "Beetle in your tummy?"!! haha....ugh. I'm so so sorry, son!

I ordered you a bouncer/activity center this morning! You're just so antsy to be upright, you no longer are happy laying down or in your swing. You really need something to hold you up and entertain you..so after looking at a ton of them I finally picked one. It should be here by the end of the week! You're still too small according to the specifications, but a couple of reviews parents said that they bought it for their advanced little ones, so I'm confident that with a little propping you will be okay. Mommy is just so tired of trying to hold you in a standing position all the time!
I tried putting your swing facing the kitchen last night when I made dinner, and it helped because you didn't cry, but you frowned at me the whole time! lol! You just need something more. And you already have used the Johnny Jump Up, but you get bored, so this activity bouncer has lots of toys all over it,. as well as some hooks to add whatever toys we want to. I'm excited!

In other news, this is mommy's last week at home with you! :( I go back to work next week. The time has gone so fast, I can't believe how old you are! Feels like I was just pregnant yesterday! But you will have a lot of fun home with daddy, and Grandma is super excited for the days you will spend with her! I don't have to worry about you while I'm at work, but gosh, I'm still gonna miss you something terrible! I don't even like thinking about it.

Well, perhaps unrelated or not to the beetles, you've been really fussy the past week. Very unhappy and tearful in ways that are unlike you. It might still be the thrush meds, hard to tell, or maybe it's just a phase. Harder to get you to eat from a bottle, and you want to be held all the time. Safe to say, I'm getting less accomplished! haha! But that's okay. Babies will be babies! You've been stuffy lately too, so daddy set up the humidifier in your room. It helped the first night, but you've been in bed with us the last few nights so I may have to move it in there. We will see. It's a nice humidifier though, makes it really nice and moist in the room.

Your two month appointment is Tuesday! Ack! Daddy has to work so I will be taking you all by myself to get your shots! I'm so sad, nothing is harder than watching your baby in pain! But you'll be a good boy I'm sure. I'll just nurse you afterward and I'm sure you will recover. I still feel bad though! The pediatricians office is so nice, I'm sure they'll let me stay and calm you down for as long as I need.

Anyway, you're napping right now so I'm going to get ready, we have to run to Walmart for some more liquid formula since the Enfamil just won't work! It's rainy, and I want to beat the rush. Love you son!

Love Always,
Mommy